Quote Wall

I have a quote wall.  

Right here at work.

It's actually thoughts that my past coworker (miss her) and I would type to each other while the other was on the phone, with someone or talking to someone that, well, sparked the thought.....or annoyance.

And because it's April 1st and it's just a day to laugh, I think i'll post them all here for your enjoyment, and yes, these are real.............real funny!

RE: Our past "receptionist" who put all blonde jokes to shame

I wonder if sugar puff over there caught on or if she's just like "la la la lala"

If she only had a clue how things really are in the world. 

I'm not even sure that she should have a driver's license. Her directions to places should include which unicorn to turn by and how many gumdrops she has to pass before she gets there.

RE: Some of the sub contractors we deal with

Go away creepy old bald guy! We do not do those kinds of things here...like listening intently on the boring things that are being verbally vomited out of your mouth.

This idiot is going t be kicking himself in the junk when he doesn't get the job. 

"I knew i shouldn't have sent the bid twice!! Dang It! STUPID STUPID STUPID!!"

Hey guy that won't shut up....SHUT YOUR HOLE!! Blah blah blah 

And news flash, your doors aren't any different than anyone else's doors. You just want us to think they are. And we don't care if you're available 24/7 because WE'RE not even available 24/7. Go away

And distressing's not all that special. Distressed doors are as common as distressed denim now. Sorry. 11 years......I have feces in my colon that's 11 years old, buzz off. No, that's ok, Mr. Pushy Door Manufacturer, I don't want to hear the "one more thing that you have to discuss"

RE: Past worker : He was afraid of the boss and had little man syndrome

I bet the little turd wishes he were never born...lol. Just bite the bullet and get it over with, CALL HIM

Take THAT! No I didn't email those things out, you fag. Do our job, you don't get paid for nothing!

Oh, I bet! What an A. He's just trying to cut corners any way possible. The only reason he wants us to do all of his work is so he has someone to blame when it doesn't get done instead of him being the one getting reamed. Then he has the balls to say "I seriously wouldn't mind coming back here" today. 

YEA RIGHT! You're already gone as far as we're concerned buddy! You're stepping on your own wiener. That's def. hypothetically because he is probably smaller than my pinky-YUCK

FOR REAL! Like come on, it's not as bad as you think, just get some balls and do it-RETARD!

RE: Normal daily banter

fdsidisfusfsrsefcvasa.........YEA!

oh, and "KISS MY A*$"

Food for thought: If we can work with him, we can work with anyone. It's time to take our dresses off, get our brass balls out of the drawer and let em swing! Tea party's over, it's BUSINESS TIME!

If that's not stick'n it to the man, I don't know what is.

(the following names have been changed to protect the innocent)(whatever)

"Molly, It's Sally! What's going on with these subs, are they going to get these jobs or what?"

"Well Sally, what's going on with you? Are you going to Grab my Boob's or what?" 

(4 minutes later)

in a dragged out monotone mans voice"Hey Molly, it's Jessie. I heard you asked Sally if she could G your B's. 

I just wanted to see if I could help you out with that since i'm a big lesbo"

(10 minutes later)

hi pitched voice "Hi Molly, it's Heather! I hear you like to get your B's G'd!! ME TOO!!!"