Friday, March 28, 2008

What a woman.....week, I mean WEEK!

Three things happened this week that all have something to do with or in my car.

1. I went 432 miles on one tank of gas. Usually, I'm lucky if I push 398. Aw Yea!

2. So after almost running low and out of gas I pulled into a station to fill up. As I'm finishing, a friendly attendant walks over to me and says:

"You look like somebody I know but better. . . . .
I don't know if I should apologize or not, what do you think?"

ME: "I think you should apologize to them"

We laugh and I get in my car. I'm thinking that was pretty hilarious so I begin to write this all down. I notice him walking back over to my car so I roll down the window and then he says to me:
"Are you waiting for me to say goodbye or your husband to come out?
Because if he's 6'4" and 320 lbs, I'll pretend I don't know you"

Oh, did I mention to you that he's about 65 years old?

3. Earlier this week I got pulled over by the finest officer of the Utah Highway Patrol of SLC.

The down side: The sun was in my eyes.

The up side: The effect of the sun in my
big, beautiful, blue-green-gray eyes
left him mesmerized
and
left me with a warning.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

lol. Literally, L O L !

Hey everybody, just checking in this week. Not much to report. Nothing funny has really happened........oh wait.............except these texts between me and my bro-in-law.

H: I'm in a meeting
U: Sure you are. I'll be over tonight
H: thanks
U: But what's this about tools?
H: Just a reference to bring what you need to measure
U: Oh, your basement. I couldn't understand your message. I thought you said "can you help punch someone in the face who I think is a tool?"
H: I said grab a guy named Fred by the tool
U: not get naked and meet me by the pool?
H: As long as his name is Fred and he is cool


Haa haa haa! Gotta love the fam!

Saturday, March 22, 2008

A Good Reminder

Today I found myself enlightened by the things I picked up to read. I browsed through a few books and fortune cookies and every one I read gave me some insight to who I was, how I could be better, and what I need to remember.
I hope these apply to you as much as they did me.









Maybe I should start reading more..............or putting on more shows!

Friday, March 21, 2008

GOOD FRIDAY!

Today I left work at 4pm. I haven't worked less than 9 hr/day since I can't remember.

After this weeks events and mass meetings, it was much deserved and much needed!

Talk about a GOOD FRIDAY!

Friday, March 14, 2008

Across the Universe- that's one trip I will never take again.....

So everybody, grab a doobie, light it up, and be sure to inhale because that's the only thing that will make this movie worth sitting through.

My sisters and I have a thing where if we see a bad movie, we will actually encourage them to go see it simply for the fact that "I alone should not be the only one who wasted 2 hours of my life." We won't give anything away just that "YOU HAVE TO GO SEE IT!" Examples to this are Message in a Bottle, Unbreakable, and The Perfect Storm.

But I in good conscience can NOT allow another human, sober or high, to waste 2 1/2 hours of their life that could be better used on clipping their toe nails and creating braille art for an organization aimed at empowering the blind.

In fact being blind would have made this movie better because the only real quality it held was a soundtrack based on songs from the Beatles. I wanted to poke my EYES out with each scene that had no relevance to the basis of any character in this movie or in my life for that matter.

"Hey Bono, thanks for the cameo-koo koo kachu" but could that really have been Robin Williams because I couldn't tell.

My sister rented it at the recommendation of one of her young women. We should have known better coming from a girl who is clearly smok'n the doobie and for that matter so is the Hollywood Video clerk who told her it too was a really good movie. I think that with each rental of this movie there ought to be a stash of weed, rolling paper, and a roach clip inside the case because that's how you'll get through the movie and it's WAY worth the $5 you paid to rent the stupid show.

So for all you out there lookin' for a reason to have the munchies, may I suggest you go see Across the Universe. I'm thinking about doing a remake entitled A Cross in my Purse: a docu-drama about pot smoking nuns asking each other "how do you solve a problem like Maria?" No one really makes outfits out of drapes unless you are high and everyone knows Edelweiss is Austrian for weed.

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

go go go!


Something I just registered for and I haven't even begun to train for this one.

Do you think I could be a compulsive register-er? I enjoy the thrill of knowing I'm challenging myself yet I'm the laziest person I know. It's like those who love to shop but don't have the money to pay the monthly bill. I love registering and participating in races but hate to train and lack the effort to find the time. I better start NOW before I end up killing myself.